Living MY Truth

I have been made fun of for being too Christian,
I have been ridiculed for not being Christian enough.
I have been persecuted for walking in steep religion
and judged for being too liberal.
I have been frowned on for the Bible I used
and mocked for the church I chose to attend.
It doesn't matter whose truth we choose to follow, we will be ridiculed.
But I have my own truth and I'm very passionate about that truth.
When others choose to decide whether or not I'm fit for heaven or qualify for hell
they should also consider what they haven't seen.
They haven't seen the hours of prayer and contemplation that goes behind each choice I've made.
But then again, it doesn't really matter what other people choose for me.  It only matters that I follow my truth.
You see I AM saved.  You could say I'm saved from a fiery hell but "saved" means much more to me.  It means that I'm saved from my own demise.  My own torment.  My own inner hell.  I was once "saved" in a church but I feel that was more of an acceptance into religion.  It wasn't until I was at the depth of my despair when I truly called out for HELP!  It was then that everything started to fall into place for healing.  No, God did not miraculously touch me for instantaneous healing.  It was quite the opposite.  God opened up every opportunity for me to look deep inside to free the demons that I had created to protect myself from the outward pain.  One by one those demons have been released.  Some go easily and some go kicking and screaming.  But they are leaving and leaving and leaving.  I'm dealing with my stuff.  My deep down buried emotional pain that brought on pain and sickness.

Because I no longer attend a "church" building, people want to "witness" to me and still try to save me.  But I am already saved.  Living my own truth.  Living in profound freedom.  And the more I walk this walk, the more freedom I receive.

Confessing my sins means talking (with the intention to release) about the pain and wounds I've been cradling.  The more I talk, the more light shines on the darkness, bringing it to the surface to be exposed and then set free.  It is then I am cleansed from all the unrightousness that had been cemented into my psyche since a small child.

Forsake not the assembling... please don't use that one against me unless you've studied it in context and understand the culture and time in which it was written.

God is freedom.  God is love.  God lives within each of us all the time.  The more we cleanse ourselves of all the unrighteousness, the more God can truly be revealed in us.

God is no longer in a box for me.  God is bigger than a church, a religion, and certainly bigger than human perception.  I no longer try to define God outside of God being pure love.  I don't try to understand God, only my reactions to life.  I am learning to allow life to flow through me rather than suppress and hold down anything doesn't fit into one certain belief system.  I am free.  I am free.  I am free.

My life theme lately has been "Let it go."  How perfect was the timing at the peak of walking away from every religious person and belief that tried to hold me back that I heard this song at the theater with my family.  I play it over and over and get goosebumps every time I listen.  Enjoy!

From the movie FROZEN:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kHue-HaXXzg